
Listen first, problem-solve together.
in Listening & Cooperation
Your preteen isn’t listening when you ask them to help out or do homework.
“How can we make this work for both of us?” Let them suggest the solution. The shift from command to collaboration moves the brain out of resistance.
Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish (How to Talk So Kids Will Listen) found kids cooperate when they feel heard first. Siegel & Bryson add: during conflict, a preteen’s logical brain shuts down — validating their perspective brings it back online.


